8 Reasons Why You Should Never Go to Wales
When most people (and especially most Americans) plan their first trip to the UK, a handful of destinations usually end up on their itinerary: London, Stonehenge, maybe Oxford, Edinburgh, the Scottish Highlands, and perhaps a hop over to Dublin since it's so close.
I don't know of very many people who add Wales to their first UK itinerary.
In fact, it took me more than five visits to Britain before I finally spent any mentionable amount of time in Wales. Everyone knows about London, and Scotland does a great job of marketing itself to tourists. Wales, on the other hand, largely gets overlooked.
But I get it. Because there are so many reasons why you should never go to Wales.
First, watch this video from Wales:
Why you should never visit Wales*
Reasons why you should probably never plan a trip to Wales include…
1. Castles, castles, castles
Wales has a ridiculous number of castles – over 600 of them, in fact, which leads many people to call the country the “castle capital of the world.” That seems a bit excessive, doesn't it? I mean, does a small country like Wales really need THAT many castles?
Many of them are in ruins now, and a few are UNESCO World Heritage sites. Seems like a lot of upkeep, if you ask me.
And, really, who wants to drive around and see a castle on nearly every hilltop? Doesn't that get old after a while?
2. All the legends
Wales has a lot of legends associated with it and its history, from dragons to magic swords to holy drinking vessels.
The legend of Merlin, for example, was based on the Welsh legends of the wizard Myrddin Wyllt, and many historians argue that King Arthur isn't a myth at all, but instead a real figure from Welsh history (though perhaps not actually a king). There's the mystery surrounding the Nanteos Cup, too, which many believe to be THE Holy Grail.
But c'mon, Wales. No need to be putting fairy tales in peoples heads.
3. Old language
Go home, Wales: your language is drunk.
The Welsh language is an old one – it dates back thousands of years, in fact, and is likely the oldest language in Britain. And yet the language has changed little despite so many millennia passing. It's still ridiculously difficult to speak (well, for us non-Welsh, at least), and don't even bother trying to read signs in Welsh. It's just futile.
This is seriously a place name in Wales:
It means “The Church of Mary in the hollow of the white hazel near the fierce whirlpool and the Church of Tysilio by the red cave.”
Yes. For real. It's one of the longest place names in the world.
If the place names aren't silly enough, Tolkien also based one of his versions of the Elvish language (Sindarin) on Old Welsh. So yes, it's so strange-sounding and old that it was actually the basis for a made-up fantasy language.
4. The scenery
Wales has all sorts of scenery, from rolling hills (that they call mountains) to crashing coastlines. The roads through some of this scenery are twisting and so narrow that two cars literally can't pass one another. And they're often littered with sheep.
The combination of these two things will probably mean that you'll stop a lot when driving and you'll be late to everything.
And then there are the beaches, which are far too empty and clean compared to ones you'll find elsewhere in Europe. Some have even won awards and stuff, which kind of just makes it feel like Wales is showing off.
5. Adventure sports
People in Wales are a little crazy.
Not only do they do things like surfing and whitewater rafting in frigid mountain water, but they also like to fly down mountainsides on bikes, hurtle over old quarries on zip lines, and even invented a sport that combines swimming, coastal hiking, and cliff jumping in a sport the Welsh have dubbed “coasteering.”
I know of New Zealand as an adventure-crazy country, but Wales may be just as insane when it comes to inventive (and abundant) ways to hurt yourself.
RELATED: 7 Epic Adventures to Have in North Wales
6. Adorable towns
Little Welsh towns – like the ones you'll find in Snowdonia – are unbearably cute. With old stone buildings and cozy low-ceilinged cafes and pubs, it's just too much.
Dial back on the quaintness, Wales. Seriously. You're going to leave people very disappointed when they visit other villages after these.
7. Welsh humbleness
People in wales are far too humble. Whereas in Scotland they are quick to tell you what a town or loch or island is famous for, in Wales you almost have to force it out of the locals.
They also don't like to brag about their famous Welsh residents (like Tom Jones and Roald Dahl) or about cool accomplishments (they built the first traffic suspension bridge) or fun facts (Wales is home to a 4,000 year old tree!).
Stop being so darn sheepish, Wales! (I mean, I know you HAVE lots of sheep, but you don't need to act like them.) A little bragging every once in a while will do you good.
8. Not a lot of tourists
Lastly, since most tourist to the UK go to places like London and Edinburgh, you'll find many parts of Wales virtually devoid of any tourists. You can walk into a pub in many small cities and find only locals speaking Welsh (who will give you a strange look when you start speaking English).
Even the touristy places still feel very quiet.
It's a real shock after visiting so many other parts of the UK where you just find busloads and busloads of tourists.
*I don't hate Wales, folks
To address all the angry people leaving comments on this post… of course I don't actually hate Wales!
In case my snarkiness didn't come through, let me state it plainly: this entire post is written tongue-in-cheek.
These are all reasons why you SHOULD visit Wales. I think Wales is an amazing part of the UK, and I'm frankly baffled over why more people don't visit.
With all the castles, beautiful scenery, outdoor adventure, and the fact that there aren't a ton of tourists, there's really no denying that Wales is a great destination.
I only spent a handful of days in northern Wales, but it was long enough for me to conclude that Wales is very special (and I'm definitely not saying that just because I have a Welsh surname…).
In fact, I think my next trip to the UK might be JUST a trip to Wales!
Who's ready to plan a trip to Wales?
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*Note: I was a guest of Visit Wales and Visit Britain on this trip, but all opinions – along with replies to all nasty comments left by people who haven't actually read this post – as always, are 100% my own.
Amanda Williams is the award-winning blogger behind A Dangerous Business Travel Blog. She has traveled to more than 60 countries on 6 continents from her home base in Ohio, specializing in experiential and thoughtful travel through the US, Europe, and rest of the world. Amanda only shares tips based on her personal experiences and places she's actually traveled!
what a cute post!!! made me laugh a lot. just love your sense of humor. and yes, definitely avoiding wales now…not 🙂
It was a fun post to write – sometimes you just need to mix it up a little bit!
ssshhhhh…
😉 I just couldn’t keep it a secret!
This was hilarious! I was thinking you’d be writing about bad weather and sheep but this was even better!
Haha, glad you enjoyed it! I had fun writing it. 🙂
Now I want to go to Wales! I have no idea how it’s not insanely popular if it’s as awesome as your posts make it seem. Like Wales was never on my bucket list before but after reading about it it may have jumped nearly to the top 🙂 And I would actually consider planning an entire trip around Wales, and taking side trips to the rest of the UK, cause it really seems like my kind of place!
It’s such an underrated and overlooked destination, but I really do think it’s amazing!
I am only 5″1′ tall, I think that red small house is just perfect for me! 🙂
You know what’s funny? The guy who originally lived there was a fisherman who was over 6 feet tall!
This post makes me want to go to Wales even more! We had it on our UK list (first time) this past summer, but due to a air traffic control strike our flight was delayed and later cancelled. I guess this means we will just have to go back and spend our entire vacation time in Wales! 😉
I’d say that sounds like a pretty good plan!
I spent a few days in Wales back in ’09 and really loved it! It’s certainly underrated as a destination with such a gorgeous landscape, and of course, all of the castles! Definitely can’t wait to return to the Land of Dragons again. Thanks for sharing!
“Underrated” is definitely the word! I loved it a lot, and see many more trips to Wales in my future.
I have a picture of the lengthy name at the train station too! 🙂
Speaking of castles in Wales, Cardiff’s famous Castle is worth visiting too. You can easily spend a few hours there as well as exploring the city center.
I didn’t visit Cardiff on my first trip, but it’s definitely on the list for next time!
I wouldn’t be able to give you a sensible reason for not visiting Wales yet. Even while I lived in Edinburgh for three years, it didn’t even cross my mind. How foolish I was! I make a solemn promise to Wales not to skip it next time I visit the UK!
A very wise promise to make, I think! 😉
Sshhh, Wales is meant to be a secret.
Exactly why I’m telling people they should never go there! 😉
I know a (non-Welsh) guy who can say that name and uses that to impress people whenever he can 😀
Apart from that, you are absolutely right. Wales looks like such a dull place and I desperately want to go..!
Mad props to that guy – I certainly would be impressed!
Hmm, finally something worth reading about Wales! I’m a bloke who likes things simple and the quaintness of Wales is great for me. Plus, I don’t think I’ll have any problems with cars, as I go about my trips in a bicycle. I’ll enjoy Wales very much…can’t wait!
If you like quiet and great scenery, you’ll love Wales! (And I saw lots of cycling groups there, too! Just be careful on those crazy roads…)
I DID go do Wales on my first trip to the UK. I was staying nearby in Northwest England and went to Wales nearly every weekend. The hiking there is amazing and so is the scenery.
That’s awesome to hear! And yes, great hiking there too!
I hate it when English people say “they stop speaking when they hear you speaking English” that’s an old myth that needs to die. It just doesn’t happen. I’ve lived all over Wales and I speak Welsh but I’ve never heard of this happening (English is my first language)
Wales is very awesome though.
If you are an English only speaker, and you enter a pub in a Welsh village where they all speak welsh, chances are that they’ll stop speaking Welsh and use English instead to make the guest feel more welcome is all it is. Hope this clears it up a tad for you? 🙂
I want to go just to see that place name sign! Crazy.
Haha yes it’s definitely an attraction all it’s own!
I live in this town, they’ve closed the train station unfortunately and I think the shop (james pringles) might be closing down because of covid. I really wish they would update a lot of stuff here and make it more interesting. Although there is a pretty path leading down to the Menai strait 🙂
Well this post convinced me to never go to Wales. I mean, who wants to see castles and learn about fairy tales? Not me, ew.. 😉
I cannot wait to go one day!!!!!
I know, right? What a truly awful place! 😉
I LOVED it!
That’s WME for you. It is completely obvious that this article is portraying a sarcastic image of our non independent Principality of wales. Yet this village idiot is unable to sense this. Your too easily offended. All of you Welsh natz.
I been to Wales one i want go back 2021 spend time there suppose big festival around July 4 like spend couple weeks i didnt like London love a pkace called Snowdonia would love help places to go my name Gary Lewellyn my family came from Walesm
I am lucky enough to live in this beautiful country.
What the h*ck people these are stupid reasons. Castles and fairy tales are part of welsh culture and you are insulting it.
… It’s called sarcasm. Wales is of course an amazing place!
I have said this before and I will say it again, what you write is not sarcasm, sarcasm is nasty, the lowest form of wit though sometimes very clever. What you write is called tongue in cheek, not nasty but jokey.
I don’t understand… Was this a joke? These almost all seem like reasons to go to Wales?
Did you read “the caveat” where I say this whole post is tongue-in-cheek (i.e. a sarcastic way of saying Wales is awesome)?
I read it all Amanda and picked up very quickly you meant the opposite to what you were saying! Very cleverly written! 🙂
Visit the breathtaking Brecon Beacons one day! 🙂
True, its very pretty in wales
I hated you so much until the last paragraph 🙂