8 Truths About Traveling as an Introvert
This may come as a surprise to anyone who hasn't met me in real life, because of course it's easy to scan through my blog posts and imagine me to be a certain way – people have used words like “adventurous,” “outgoing,” and even “brave” to describe the me on the computer screen.
But the reality is that, while I *can* be all of those things, I'm actually an introvert at heart.
I'm not necessarily shy (that's a common misconception about introverts!), but I'm also not going to be the first one to strike up a conversation or suggest going to a party. Like most introverted people, I prefer small groups to large gatherings; I can be quiet if I don't have anything to say; and I need alone time every day in order to decompress.
This might not sound like a person who would also go gallivanting around the globe, but, believe it or not, there are a LOT of introverted travelers (and even travel bloggers!) out there.
And so, in order to connect more with my people and show you that introverts can totally conquer the world, too, I've decided to dish on the realities of traveling as an introvert.
8 truths about traveling as an introvert
If you, too, are an introvert and are worried about traveling as one, here are some things you might experience while on the road. (I'm not trying to scare you off; just being honest about how I experience a travel-filled life as an introverted person!)
1. You'll stress out over the most random things
This may not be true of all introverts, but it's definitely true for me – really random things stress me out and give me anxiety while traveling. Things like asking for directions (especially in another language), getting up the nerve to walk into a restaurant alone and ask for a table for one, being thrust into social situations by new travel friends… They're all small and silly, but be prepared for the most random things to stress you out when you're traveling as an introvert.
Too many options gives me anxiety, too. For example, when I was in Seville for the first time, I decided I would go out for dinner one night. I wanted to go somewhere for tapas. But there were SO. MANY. PLACES. First, I got anxious about finding a good place to eat when there were so many to choose from. Then I got myself all worked up about going inside alone and trying to order off a menu I could only half-read.
I ended up walking around for an hour, and then giving up – I had a gourmet burger in my hotel room that night instead.
Overload like this – whether it's sensory or social or a mix of both – is a real thing that we introverts struggle with while traveling.
But you know what? That burger was one of the best burgers I had that whole year. #noregrets
RELATED: It’s Okay to Feel These (Negative) Things When You Travel
2. People will drive you nuts (sometimes)
I began my traveling career as a backpacker. I spent two summers backpacking around Europe, traveling on backpacker buses and budget airlines and staying in hostels. This forced me into socializing a lot more than I probably would have at home – often with people that I honestly probably would have avoided in my everyday life.
There were the all-night partiers that come bumbling back into the hostel dorm room at 5 a.m. to make more noise than you would think humanly possible. There were the twenty-something travelers more intent on scoring drugs than getting to know a new culture. There were the travelers who were loud and rude and inconsiderate of the fact that I just wanted to check my email and go to bed early sometimes.
And, quite frequently, these same people who drove me nuts would call me a party pooper when I didn't want to get drunk or hang out with lots of other drunk people until all hours of the morning.
Not everyone will GET that you need to have some “alone time” each night, or if you're not much of a partier and/or feel really uncomfortable in large, rowdy groups. This really bothered me when I first started traveling, but I eventually realized it wasn't worth stressing out over what other people thought of me.
Do your thing. If it aligns with what others around you want to do, too, cool. And if not, that's also okay.
3. Some days you'll have to force yourself to be social
As an introvert, you won't be predisposed to forcing yourself to socialize (or, in my case, giving in to peer pressure to socialize from others). I know this. In fact, you may start brainstorming elaborate reasons why you CAN'T join in on certain activities. I've been there; I've done it.
But, if I've learned anything about pushing myself, it's that forcing yourself to be social can sometimes be exactly what you need. I'm not saying you have to force yourself to do something you're entirely uncomfortable with – but convincing yourself to be slightly more outgoing than you would normally be can really enhance your travel experience.
Some days, you'll have to force yourself to be social. This could be as simple as going on a free walking tour with a group of other travelers instead of wandering around on your own, or could be as intense as agreeing to go on a rafting pub crawl with people you just met on a bus.
There are many days when I wake up on the road convinced that I don't want to talk to a soul that day. But then I force myself to be a little bit social, and I end up having a much better time than I would have had on my own. (You know, as long as I can curl up alone in bed with my laptop afterwards…)
4. You'll meet others like you
When I first started traveling (on that backpacker trail, remember), I would DREAD meeting new people in hostels because I assumed that they all would only be interested in partying. I was under the incorrect assumption that I was always destined to be the odd one out.
This, of course, could not be further from the truth.
I mean, yes, I DID meet plenty of backpackers who only wanted to party. But I also met plenty of other travelers just like me – introverts trying to figure out where they fit in to the travel landscape.
I remember being really apprehensive about doing a guided trip with Busabout during my backpacking days. I knew I'd be traveling on a large bus with lots of other young travelers, and I was terrified that I wouldn't fit in with any of them. Thankfully, though, I immediately hit it off with three Australian girls – one traveling solo and the other two traveling together – who shared my preference for beach days and sightseeing over all-night parties. We had so much fun together that they didn't really even have to try hard to convince me into having one big night out at a treehouse club in Montenegro.
This has been a recurring theme on my travels. No matter how much I stress out over not being able to meet people due to my introverted ways, I always end up connecting with a small group of fellow travelers. And it's often those beautiful people who turn up in my fondest travel memories.
5. Slow or solo travel might be a good fit for you
Even though backpacking wasn't as traumatizing as I originally feared it would be, I realized after a while that it just wasn't my ideal style of travel. Moving around so frequently and sharing my bedroom with so many strangers caused me a lot of unneeded stress. I got sick frequently, and the anxiety that has plagued me on and off since high school would often creep up the night before I had to navigate another airport or train station or set of bus schedules.
For many introverts, slower travel – i.e. staying in one place longer than just a couple of nights – is easier to adjust to than what I like to call “FOMO-style travel” (i.e. rushing around to see as much as you possibly can). It's less stressful and lets you get to know destinations at a slower pace, on your own terms. If it takes you a few days to get comfortable talking to strangers or branching out from the area where you're staying, traveling slower is a natural choice.
I think it's also safe to say that solo travel might be a better fit for many introverted travelers. While I DO like to travel in small groups or with my husband every now and then, solo travel gives you all the freedom you need to travel in the way that works best for you.
When I'm traveling alone and I hit a travel day where I don't want to force myself to be social, I simply don't have to. I can enjoy my own company for the entire day, doing what I want when I want to do it.
And, on the other hand, if you've had enough alone time and want to be more social, you're much more approachable as a solo traveler – don't be surprised when strangers just start talking to you in public!
RELATED: Why I'm Not Afraid to Travel Alone
6. You'll find ways to adapt that work for you
There's no “one size fits all” style of travel for us introverts. What works for me might not work for you. But, ultimately, you'll find ways to adapt and mold your travel style into whatever suits you best.
You might find that renting apartments instead of staying in hostels or hotels gives you the relaxing space you need to recharge at night. You might find that wearing headphones in public is effective when you're in a non-social mood. You may find that taking a Kindle with you to dinner helps combat the stress/awkwardness of eating alone when you're traveling solo. (I've gotten much more comfortable with this over the years.)
Whatever your tricks are, you'll figure them out by simple trial and error and will eventually settle into the perfect travel style for YOU.
7. You may not ever come “out of your shell” – and that's totally fine
A lot of people talk about the transformative power of travel; about how it changed their lives and brought them “out of their shell.”
Sure, it's possible that travel may transform your life and help you shed some of your introverted ways. But, then again, it may not. And that's okay, too! Being an introvert isn't a BAD thing, and certainly doesn't mean that you can't have an awesome and fulfilling travel experience.
Despite how it might come across on this blog, I'm no less introverted today than I was when I first started traveling years ago. I still stress out on travel days. I still have days where I don't want to be social. I still need time and space to decompress (alone) after a long day.
But that's just who I am, and who I will always be. And I've come to accept and even embrace that.
8. You can absolutely still travel as an introvert
If you take anything away from this post, I hope it will be that you can still travel – AND have an awesome time – as a more introverted person. You aren't destined to always be the odd one out; there will be people to connect with should you want to.
And, at the end of the day, traveling in any way, shape, or form is SO much better than not traveling at all. So don't let your introvertedness hold you back.
Are you an introverted traveler, too? Share your story in the comments below!
Amanda Williams is the award-winning blogger behind A Dangerous Business Travel Blog. She has traveled to more than 60 countries on 6 continents from her home base in Ohio, specializing in experiential and thoughtful travel through the US, Europe, and rest of the world. Amanda only shares tips based on her personal experiences and places she's actually traveled!
My husband and I are introverts as well. We love visiting with friends or meeting new people when we travel, but we definitely need the quiet down time to recuperate. We also shy away from very noisy or crowded places if possible or find a quiet place to escape after the sensory overload (That’s you Las Vegas and Nashville!). There was never a time in my life where I thought a hostel was a good idea! We enjoy renting homes or apartments in areas where we are spending a few days since that gives us more space to unwind and have some quieter meals. We often bring our own breakfast to eat in the room rather than going to a free breakfast buffet, but it depends on the situation. That allows us to keep our normal routine in the morning and start off refreshed. Generally, we don’t like cruises, but enjoyed a couple of river cruises with fewer passengers. One lesson learned–do not go to the Rijksmuseum on Easter Sunday because it is family day!
Relate! For many trips over many years, I am the organizer/planner/leader. Love to do it and I am absolutely energized by our travel. But, I also make sure I plan for the introvert me time with a laundry/relax day. Or, if needed, a “I’m not that hungry so you guys go ahead to dinner” (so I can take a solo walk). And sometimes I’ll use the “lets split up and meet later at…” Lots of folks do not understand how energy draining socializing can be for us. And the funny part is, just as you suggest, the people who travel with me comment on how engaging and outgoing I am. LOL
Fellow introvert here!
I was in a B & B in Conwy Wales once to visit the castle. I saw the castle, but other than a walk through town, I completely froze. I had tea with the owner of the B & B, but I didn’t even leave my room to get supper. I was so hungry, but I couldn’t bear the thought of dealing with yet one more Welsh accent in a bar where I would be alone.
I wondered if I could even find one that had an available seat. What is the etiquette for asking for a menu?
I was pathetic.
But we didn’t have the internet back then, so I don’t know how I would have overcome my fears. These days, you just open your smart phone and you’ll have all the information you need to find a place to eat. We are so spoiled.
It can definitely be stressful, and I agree that we are so spoiled now with the internet and smartphones! It certainly makes solo travel a lot easier.
This article sums up me and travelling perfectly. Yes I’m an introvert, but I’m not shy. I love my own space and need some quiet time to recover each day, more if I have been with plenty of people during the day.
There are a lot of us out there like this!
I’m a total Introvert. Few friends as I have very distinct interests compared to my colleagues. Solo travelling is what makes me feel alive. Most importantly because I can do whatever I want without any worries and also as you said it helps me to connect with people of similar interests.
[…] 8 Truths About Traveling As An Introvert – A Dangerous Business […]
I’m an extreme introvert and the littlest things make me anxious! One time I chickened out on my mother-in-law’s Christmas cookie party (all-out-emotional-breakdown chickened out) because the thought of being in a room full of women I didn’t know freaked me out. On the other hand, I have started to enjoy my company and feel comfortable in my own skin. I eat at restaurants and go shopping by myself. I would like to travel to London, San Francisco, Portland and Seattle alone soon. Great post! 🙂
I know it sucks to feel so anxious that you skip out on things like that, but it’s great that you’re becoming comfortable enough on your own to consider traveling solo – that’s awesome!
Thank you for this very insightful post! I can totally relate to that… through blogging, evoking a completely different picture, compared to the feeling when being on the road. Managing a lot of things and being proud of oneself, but then getting upset about this tiny little detail… well, it’s great to know people like you are out there 🙂 We’ll do this! Happy travels!
[…] using my cell phone did not suddenly cure me of my introversion. Not answering emails after dinner did not mean I sat up late at night drinking chicha with the […]
Thank you for writing this, it is so spot on! I always struggle with wanting to go out and have fun with people, but getting really anxious about it at the same time.
I went on a 6 week trip to Europe a couple of years ago with some friends and part of it was a 4 week Contiki tour. As you can imagine, most of the group just wanted to be out all night drinking and partying (a social situation I don’t think I’ll ever be that comfortable with). There were a couple of occasions where I got so stressed out because I wanted to go out and have fun but also felt so uncomfortable that I just burst into tears.
Luckily my friends (and the majority of the tour group for that matter) never tried to pressure anyone into staying out, and were of the mindset of ‘if you don’t want to do something, no big deal’. I also found a couple of other girls on the tour that never wanted to be out a whole lot either. So most of the time we would go out for dinner with everyone, stay out for about an hour and then make our way back to the hostel together.
It’s very good that you had an understanding group, and that you found some other travelers with a similar mindset to hang out with. I find that there are ALWAYS other introverts on group tours – you just have to find them!
Whatever your character is, it’s a poor excuse not to see the world. You just need to look at it at another angle 🙂
Very true! I never use my introversion as an excuse not to travel. I may sometimes use it as an excuse not to go out, but it’ll never stop me from seeing the world! 😉
I loved this post! I’m a definite introvert. I can’t stand dorm rooms, and am actually quite happy having dinner on my own with a good book. I generally spend a lot of time just wandering on my own, but I’ve been known to do day tours of places for ease of seeing things. I LOVE slow, solo travel and I doubt I’ll ever travel with someone again. Thanks again for your post.
Hello! Thanks for writing this post! I started out as a backpacker too and experienced many of the same things with hostels. Some people had trouble understanding why I would want to decompress and sleep (instead of party) after a day of exploring. I eventually discovered that I need my own space (yay Airbnb) and need to travel more slowly. And nearly every time I’ve had to take a deep breath and force myself to be social…the world didn’t implode. Phew!
I also find it much easier to chat with people both through practice and because I now travel with my dog. Instant conversation starter on an easy topic! 😀
Oh, yes, traveling with a dog would be an instant conversation starter for sure!
It’s great that you’ve figured out your travel style, and now know how to work around it!
Yeah, as an introvert too, I exactly knowwhat you mean….I had to laugh, when I read about the hamburger because I had the same problems finding a restaurant to eat alone in some cities I visited 🙂
Thanks for this article. It comes at the right time because I will go on a solo trip to Bali soon and I am a bit frightned about exactly the things you write about here 🙂
While it’s true that traveling as an introvert comes with its challenges, I still think it’s so worth doing. I’m sure you’ll have a great time in Bali!
Love this! I have struggled with the feeling of being a party pooper not only when I travel – but also at home. It’s the worst. I knew that hostels would never be good for me so 30 countries later… I still haev never stayed at a hostel!!
I like how you mentioned that introverts are not necessarily shy…. huge misconception.
My closest friends and family see my loud, crazy side – and it’s hard because they expect me to be that way out in public or big groups.Not the case at all.
Yup! I know a lot of people who identify as introverts who aren’t shy at all! I wouldn’t call myself shy, either – but I do sometimes take a little while to feel comfortable in a large group of people, which leads people to *think* I’m shy. My close friends would be able to tell you otherwise, though! 😉